Jared came into the office and he was emotionally exhausted. He had been on a coaching call the night before and the client was mad at him. The client felt Jared was untrustworthy and didn’t care. Anyone who knows Jared knows that this couldn’t be further from the truth.
We’ve all had bad days when we are in a sh*t poor mood and we snap at everyone around us. Is everyone in the world that much more annoying that day? Or is it possible that we are projecting our sh*t onto others?
Projecting our sh*t onto others is extremely common (kind of). It is considerably less common with high achievers. Why? When we project our issues onto others it acts as a protective amour, an excuse, it validates our own failures or insecurities. In turn, we don’t deal with our issues, they hold us back and we never achieve the success we strive for. We stay average.
This happens ALL the time in a coaching relationship. People blame their lack of success on their coach…..My coach doesn’t know what they are talking about, my coach is an asshole, my coach doesn’t care, my coach just wants my money etc etc…. The truth is this is natural (but as a coach you have to have pretty broad shoulders to take it). It’s part of the process of breaking the cycle of behaviour that has held you back to this point. The truth is your coach is not an asshole and they do care (or they wouldn’t be in this business to start with). Your coach is your ally, they are there to support you. The truth is you will project onto them and they will help you through it.
The truth is ….own your sh*t and success will follow.